Friday morning.
Exercise is going very well, eating has its ups and downs, actually it was good until last night, when I couldn't eat or think about food, but it's a minor step back and it's only because I finally left thomas, for good. Forever.
I was doing so good, I was getting stronger and my mind was clear. So I decided to go to thomas's place to bring his stuff back. I couldn't stand to have his things here, and I wanted to put an end to whatever "power" he thought he still had over me by leaving his clothes in my house. The conversation was short. I left telling him he was not the right man for me and he looked sad/shocked. I wished him the best and turned away and never looked back. I cried a little bit in the car, but I know I made the right decision. The reasons he gave for leaving me showed me there was no hope for our relationship.
I think love is more important than misunderstandings, that after 6 months you don't know each other and you have to make efforts to ask questions if you want answers. I gave him my heart, I showed him everyday how much I loved him and how bad I wanted things to work. He refused to see it and blamed me for not telling him how I felt. Honestly, when someone is here for you day after day, tells you "I love you" everyday, supports you, do you need this person to tell you more? Maybe I am wrong, maybe I didn't act the right way. Maybe I didn't give him what he needed. But this who I am. I show and prove my love instead of telling words. It's even more true in English. Hard to say things when you don't have the right words coming to your mind at the right time... I am not spontaneous in English. Maybe that's the problem!
Anyway, I know there is a future, I want to believe that someday I will find a man to share my life. For now, I need to focus on my new career, on building a social life and professional network. I need to give myself a chance to meet new people. Please tell me there is someone somewhere for me!
Happy Friday buddies!
View Diet Calendar, 07 December 2012:
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728 kcal
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Fat: 33.06g | Prot: 76.85g | Carbs: 30.79g.
Breakfast: butter, egg. Lunch: monterey jack, green soup, bison meat, half and half. Snacks/Other: nonfat milk, Almond Breeze Unsweetened Chocolate Milk. more...
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2144 kcal
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Exercise:
Walking (exercise) - 5.5/kph - 4 hours, Weight Training (moderate) - 30 minutes, Resting - 11 hours and 30 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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