I hate how quick people are to judge. Mental health is taboo amongst many people where I live. My daughter has ADHD and doesn't do well at school. This is the third time she's going through the 6th grade (1st of junior high), and her doctor prescribed Ritalin to see if it works. We've tried different schools, from the public to the most expensive ones. We've tried therapy. We've tried everything. And now that she'll start meds, everyone around my support system is trying to shut it down (including her dad). "That makes them dumb," "that makes them slow," "that's not good for children," "you can't give her that; you're not a bad mom." It's exhausting. I've taken the same med, and I'm fine, not dumb, not slow, no nothing, and I am most definitely not a bad mom. I've had it with people thinking they know everything. Why don't they give me the solution if they're so knowledgeable? Please, I'd be happy to be enlightened. And by the way, why haven't they given me a solution in the past 13 years? I've had it.
So sorry for the rant. This is the only place where I can write and get advice without breaking relationships :(
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117.5 kg
Lost so far: 14.4 kg.
Still to go: 52.5 kg.
Diet followed: Reasonably Well.
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View Diet Calendar, 27 October 2022:
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913 kcal
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Fat: 42.77g | Prot: 84.32g | Carbs: 50.02g.
Lunch: Newman's Own Balsamic Vinegar, Green String Beans, Mozzarella Cheese, Tomatoes, Chicken Breast. Dinner: Colanta Yogur Griego Limon, Egg, Finesse Queso Mozarella, Frescampo Arepa Minitela. more...
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Losing 4.2 kg a Week
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1 to 20 of 30
![](https://m.ftscrt.com/static/images/box/membersicon.gif) Comments
Don't listen to those misguided souls. You know what is best for your daughter. My son has ADD Inattentive type, so I feel your frustration with the school system. They are not willing to change from a 'one-size-fits-all' system to something more personalized because it is hard to do that. And as for meds, if my brother was not on Lithium and Ritalin, he would be a danger to himself and others. Not because he is violent. He is a teddy bear and hates violence. Violence upsets him. But without the meds, he gets paranoid. His perception of what is going on is not typical. He will convince himself of things that don't seem like logical conclusions. But this is not who he is! This is the condition speaking. And we ALL see things through our own filters. I SO agree with your frustration on this topic. It is maddening how judgemental people can be. Rant away, sister! I will join you.
27 Oct 22 by member: unity1234
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Hang in there. My ex denied that our child got migraines and refused to get help for her. Now she is an adult, she takes all the meds that stop her from getting the migraines - it's like a miracle!
27 Oct 22 by member: abbadabba
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My oldest son had ADD. Without hyperactivity. Ritalin made him sleep. But teacher said he’s so quiet and well behaved. So we took him off of that. Gave him an allergy pill every
Morning. Anyway if she asked do you take your pill he would say yes. So she said he’s so good on the med. ha ha ha
27 Oct 22 by member: caraken
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Special Ed teacher here - I hope you find what works best for your child! It can be quite a frustrating process to figure out the right med and dosage.
27 Oct 22 by member: LRH54
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I would like to make one clarification to my previous post. My frustrations almost always lie with systems and not individuals. People are wondrous. Society can make me annoyed. Generally, people care for other people. Society tends to perpetuate whatever system is already in place even if it means ignoring their own real experiences.
27 Oct 22 by member: unity1234
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congratulations to you on your weight drop, please be encouraged, and do what makes things better for you and your daughter Hugs
27 Oct 22 by member: buenitabishop
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It’s hard to say if it’ll work or not - Ritlan affects everyone differently. My boyfriend has adhd and Ritlan made him feel like a tweaker. But it may work for your daughter. It works for some people, but you never know until you try. Forget what anyone else says. You’re not a bad mom. Sorry you’re going through all this. And if it makes you feel any better, although my boyfriend has adhd and didn’t do well in school, he’s now a professional magician. I just think the traditional school system doesn’t work for everyone - we’re all wired differently.
27 Oct 22 by member: jdumbeck
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27 Oct 22 by member: Selena Love
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I’ve been on meds since I was probably 10 and I’m better off with them! I stopped taking them as a teen and my education suffered
Finally my senior year I took my meds again and it was great it sucked that I had to redo 9th grade and 10th grade classes to graduate but after that I figured why stop taking them they do nothing but help me, the only way I can explain it is tangled Christmas lights that’s my brain constantly but when I take my meds it’s like i know exactly what to do to untangle the mess. It’s not a bad thing
27 Oct 22 by member: AshleyC3989
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gwzfire, thank you so much. You get me :)
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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abbadabba, thank you!!! I'm glad your daughter is taking care of herself. Migraines are the worst!
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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caraken, hahahaha I love your story. Looks like Ritalin affects everyone differently. I would get super focused and nothing would distract me.
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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LRH54, Thank you so much!
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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Thank you, buenitabishop ♥
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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jdumbeck, thank you! I love magic, I wanted to be a magician when I was a kid :D I hope she grows to be the best she can be in whatever she wants to do.
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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AshleyC3989, thank you! that's a great explanation of how she tells me she feels. though she has to explain it in a lot more words. I hope the meds help her, and if not, hopefully something else.
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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Erquiaga1, thank you!!! The public school system here is lacking a lot. The classes are around 30 to 50 students. And the teachers don't like to adhere to the measurements laid out for students with special needs. So she's treated and taught exactly like everyone else, but they give her more chances to do stuff at home at her own pace. My sister helps me to advocate for her. But she's been trying to get an appointment with the school counselor for months, and they keep waving her off. It's maddening. I have tried different schools with her, though, with totally different ways of teaching. I even got her to a personalized one where the teacher would teach her whatever she wanted to learn at that moment from the subjects of the grade. It didn't work, and I wasted way too much money. For now, I try to teach her myself as much as I can. She's so intelligent! she just can't stay put.
28 Oct 22 by member: nosequepongo
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Did you ever look into getting her an IEP through the school counselor, which is an individual education plan? With that the teachers have to give her extra time for tests and other things. My oldest daughter had ADHD. We had her on Ritalin at first, but she was losing weight and was already skinny so we had to switch her to Concentra. I would give her to her on school days only and not the weekend or summer and we had an IEP for her early on.
28 Oct 22 by member: RN16
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If they keep giving you issues, look into getting a lawyer and sue, because that's a violation against students with disabilities.
28 Oct 22 by member: RN16
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