Melissa7802's Journal

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25 January 2014

I have to pat myself on the back today.... Every Saturday my 3 year old son and I have a ritual... we do our errands in the morning and we have lunch at Wendy's. Over the past few weeks, I have stopped getting burgers and would get there Spicy Chicken Caesar Salad, a Lg. Diet Coke & a Small Frosty. So today, we went and Brady got his usual chicken nuggets, apple juice & frosty and the only thing I got was a side caesar salad and I barely used any dressing and a small diet coke that I maybe only drank half of. This is the first time, I can say that I walked in to Wendy's looking for the lowest calorie meal I could and actually sticking to it! Surprisingly, I am not very hungry .. but I am planning on making something healthy for dinner also.

For some reason, dieting seems easier than ever now... I would always sabotage my own diet but I am so motivated and feel so empowered that I just don't want to do anything that will ruin it... I don't know where exactly this motivation is coming from but it better stick around!!!!!

I tried to talk to my fiancé about how proud I was of myself with my election at Wendy's and overall with my weight loss and he just brushes me off... it bothers me that he can't listen to me or even offer some support.... he wants me to lose weight so I can be healthier, but yet shows no emotional support whatsoever. Approaching him about it, will just start an argument, so I am going to avoid it. I do have some friends around me who are there and my kids are cheering me on, so its better than nothing.

I also just went out last night and bought the new Wii Fit U and balance board. I spent a little over a half hour trying it out and I was loving it. It makes it not seem so much like exercise, but it tracks everything for you. Your weight, BMI, take pictures every time you do a body test so you can see how your body has changed over time.. I think that is another excellent motivating factor. It wears you out, but I can't wait to do it again tomorrow!!!

(3 comments)

25 January 2014

Weight:	Lost so far:	Still to go:	Diet followed:
112.3 kg	4.3 kg	44.2 kg	Reasonably Well

Add Comment Losing 4.8 kg a Week

24 January 2014

With my weigh-in today, I finally got below the 100 pounds to go mark! That really feels fantastic! I have only lost 3 1/2 pounds this week, but I feel like I have accomplished so much!!

For some reason, I could not sleep last night... I don't know what was wrong with me, but I would close my eyes and see all these vivid images... and than my dreams were terrifying... so I am extremely exhausted today..

I had no measurable appetite today... didn't even want to eat lunch, it probably wasn't good to skip the meal.. I wasn't even hungry at dinner, but I only ate because I know skipping meals is just as bad as overeating sometimes. I have not had soda in 3 days! This is huge for me because I am typically drinking a 1-2 liter bottle a day! I have been drinking more water, but I do like the carbonation, so I have been adding a little seltzer into my diet just to trick myself.

(1 comment)

24 January 2014

Weight:	Lost so far:	Still to go:	Diet followed:
112.9 kg	3.6 kg	44.9 kg	Reasonably Well

Add Comment Losing 4.8 kg a Week

23 January 2014

I am feeling positive today! I went to my rheumatologist and he informed me that since my last visit in late November, I have lost 8 lbs. Which is amazing, since most people (usually me) gain weight around the holidays! I only starting using FatSecret about a week ago, so I wasn't doing any sort of food tracking before. I do believe that some of that weight loss is because of the new medicine I was put on to help treat my Rheumatoid Arthritis. At my November visit, he started me on Enbrel and one of those side effects was decreased appetite. I was sick to my stomach for the first few weeks of taking it also and that probably also contributed to my weight loss.... but I have been trying for over a year to lose anything and would always go up and down. I am so happy that now I have finally been able to see a result.. that is recorded through medical records.. somehow that seems to mean more to me than me recording it! My rheumy also told me that based on the lab work that was done at my last visit that my RA has moved from the highly active state to the moderately active state after experiencing all the pain I have over the past year since my diagnosis and even before, I am glad to hear that. We are finally seeing measurable results and I am feeling so much better. The pain is still there, but it so much better than it used to be.

I will take the weight loss any way that I can, but that just shows me that I was even more overweight than I wanted to be. I still beat myself up about how exactly I let myself get this fat and why I can never just take charge and stay strong. I am usually a very strong-willed and strong-minded person, but when it comes to my weight, everything is on a different level.

I am almost at that mark where the amount of weight I want to lose is under 100 pounds and I can't wait for that! I feel like just knowing that it isn't over 100 is such a big accomplishment and I am only 1 pound away from that mark!

I just really need to get myself motivated at the gym. The last time I was there was in April... and I have been paying this whole time. Thankfully, two of my co-workers have joined my gym this week and we are all planning on going together starting Monday night after work! I need that motivation... when other people are there with me or pushing me to go, I will go. I think just moving around a little bit will not only help me with my weight loss, but also with the RA... there is nothing worse for your joints that not using them!! The more you move around the better... they don't have time to get stiff!!

I do have to say that I really love the fact that I can post a journal entry on here and pour my heart out and get support from other members. I don't have a lot of people in my life for support....my Mom and I barely see each other or talk to each other even though we only live 2 miles apart... most of my friends are too busy for me as I am for them and while my fiancé is there for me... he has no clue what it feels like to be fat.. he's been a toothpick his entire life and has this freakish metabolism.. he can eat anything he wants and never gain a pound. So, even though he tries, he just doesn't get it... so Thank you to everyone out there for any support!

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